Chapter 12 - Reclaim Your Vitality

Perimenopause can make you feel like your body is running away from you: stubborn weight gain, broken sleep, hot flushes, fatigue, brain fog and an edge of anger you don’t recognise. We zoom out from blame and into biology, mapping the reclaim phase as the moment you emerge from the biochemical chaos with your foundational systems finally back online. When the gut microbiome is supported, hormones are rebalanced and cortisol rhythm steadies, the body can return to a kind of resilience that feels like coming home. 

We talk metabolic flexibility in plain language, why it matters beyond weight, and how it shows up in real life: stable energy, clearer thinking, and the ability to go longer between meals without crashing. You’ll also hear why we see perimenopause as a tipping point, a line in the sand where you stop outsourcing your health and start building body literacy through food choices, sleep, movement, supplementation and connection. A continuous glucose monitor becomes a surprisingly powerful tool here, not for perfection, but for awareness and better decisions. 

Cecilia’s story brings it all to ground. She arrives furious and depleted, with hormone imbalance, insulin resistance, disrupted circadian cortisol and complicated thyroid autoimmunity, plus an ACE score that points to long-term trauma stress in the background. As her gut is repaired, deficiencies are corrected and her physiology stabilises, the emotional armour starts to soften. From that stronger place, she asks the hardest question: at what cost am I staying in a life that doesn’t reflect my worth? Her healing becomes biopsychosocial, with physical change alongside deeper congruency and the laying down of old coping mechanisms. 

If you’re ready to reclaim steady energy, metabolic health and self-trust through perimenopause, hit play, then subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so more women can find the support they deserve.

Transcript

Reclaim After The Biochemical Storm

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Chapter 12 Reclaim Beautiful woman, you are too amazing not to feel good about yourself. When I think about Reclaim, the third and final phase of the hierarchy of healing, I see it as the eventual emergence from the biochemical chaos of perimenopause. Once the right healing protocol is in place, transformation in your body is possible. Through my functional medicine lens, the transitional season of perimenopause often requires a period of chaos and breakdown first. You may be able to relate to this if you're currently in the throes of the storm of perimenopause. It's in the stormy season of this transition, this time of natural shifts in your biochemistry, that meaningful change and healing can truly begin both in your body and in your life. And this is where reclaim steps in. Up to this point, you've learned all about the biochemical storm that defines perimenopause, the time in a woman's life, in your life, when the gut microbiome can be disrupted, and you're navigating the turmoil of hormonal imbalances. Only when those systems are restored and back online, when you've repaired and rebalanced, can you fully emerge into the beautiful calm after the storm and into the sunset of reclaim. Imagine a soft breeze and sky painted pink as the sun kisses the atmosphere. It's at this point that you reclaim your metabolic health. Your body achieves metabolic flexibility, and you rediscover your vitality and vibrancy for good. Metabolic flexibility sustainable vitality I want to first describe what actually happens in your body during reclaim.

What Metabolic Flexibility Feels Like

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Namely, it's a time when you achieve metabolic flexibility. Since it's been a few chapters since we talked about what it means to be metabolically flexible, here's a reminder. Metabolic flexibility means your body can efficiently access energy through two sources, both glucose and fat, depending on what it needs, which puts your body into a fat burning state rather than a fat-storing state. However, achieving true metabolic flexibility goes way beyond weight management. It's about restoring the energy systems that power every cell in your body once the gut is healed and sealed and your hormones are back in balance. Metabolic flexibility means your body can shift smoothly between using sugar, glucose, and fat for fuel. When this ability to access both energy sources is working at an optimal level, you feel energized, focused and strong, whether you've just eaten, exercised, or gone several hours without food. I believe that this kind of resilience, this vitality, is actually part of our biological design. As we explored in chapter 4, this resilience is at the core of the grandmother hypothesis, and why, through an evolutionary lens, metabolic flexibility matters so deeply for women in their post-reproductive years. If you recall, these grandmothers of the Hadza people of Tanzania, a hunter-gatherer tribe, were lean, strong and able to thrive even in times of scarcity. These older women's ability to go longer without food, remain physically strong and support the women and children around them, played a vital role in human survival for their entire tribe, and in human flourishing. If you think about it, that same resilience, that vitality and strength still matters deeply, not just for you, but also for those you care for. And this vibrancy is exactly what's waiting for you as you step into reclaim. Women in my clinic know they've achieved metabolic flexibility when the following happens. They can fast for 12 to 16 hours without their energy crashing. Their blood glucose, blood sugar, is stable even during fasting, and you'll soon see why blood glucose monitors play an important role in Reclaim. More on that later. They can exercise in a fasted state and still feel full of energy. They feel focused and clear-minded. It's the reason I call Reclaim the final destination for sustainable vitality and vibrancy. Your tipping point.

Perimenopause As A Tipping Point

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With the huge changes you experience in your biochemistry during perimenopause, I think of this season as a tipping point. It's a time when it is imperative that you take your health into your own hands, to draw a line in the sand and take steps to heal and reclaim your foundational health. In this final pillar, it's like your body brings all the pieces together. You've adjusted and refined your food choices and eliminated any trigger foods, which allowed you to repair your gut. You've brought your hormones back into alignment. So once you step into reclaim, it feels almost easy because you're at peace within your body. In Reclaim, you've already done the hard work of repair and rebalance. You have restored your foundational health, creating powerful alchemy within your own body. That means you've achieved not only metabolic flexibility but also body literacy, which we explored earlier in the book. You know how to eat, sleep, move, think, supplement and connect in ways that support your unique biochemistry. You've discovered the true medicine that works for you. In Reclaim, you come to a deep understanding of what serves your body but also what best serves you in life, including relationships and social circumstances. At the same time, you recognize what no longer serves you as you step into a new stage of knowing yourself.

Cecilia Meets Reclaim And Congruency

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With Reclaim in mind, I want you to meet Cecilia, a beautiful soul who came to see me in a state of being so angry. But her anger was the kind of anger that inspired change. Change that required her to finally draw a line in the sand about her health and her life. More specifically, as her body healed, she restored her vitality and she rediscovered the peace in her body. Much like what you saw earlier in Claire's story, Cecilia also had a high ACE score that tapped her on the shoulder. Like what so many women experienced during perimenopause, her unresolved trauma began to surface, asking to be recognized and addressed at last. Cecilia. A story of reclaim and congruency. As we've discussed, the essence of the reclaim phase is that you begin to reap the beautiful benefits of your hard work in repair and rebalance. It's about nourishment over restriction, clarity over chaos, and connection over mere tolerance. It's not just that your symptoms lessen or your chronic issues are addressed, it's that you begin to live in peace and alignment with your body, your values, and your truth. That alignment is what I call congruency. When how you feel, how you live, and what you believe about yourself all begin to match in a powerful and transformative way. When I met Cecilia, she was 44 years old, and it was obvious she held deep resentment towards her body, frustration with her doctors, and bitterness toward her parents and partner. She was really angry at the state of her life, but what unfolded over the next nine months wasn't just physical healing and transformation. It was the slow, courageous process of her putting down her emotional armor and finally listening to her body and its wisdom. She learned how to choose herself. Cecilia's story shows what is possible when a woman stops letting anger and disconnection drive her decisions and instead begins to live in full congruence with her biochemistry, her choices for her health and her life, and most importantly, her own view of her intrinsic worth.

When Anger Signals Deeper Pathology

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It's not her, it's the pathology. When Cecilia walked into the clinic, it felt like her anger entered the room before she did. In fact, there were several occasions I had to talk my receptionist off the ledge because of Cecilia's harsh treatment of them. I had to remind them that her anger wasn't Cecilia, it was the pathology. This connects back to the idea that healing is biopsychosocial. Our mental, emotional, and physical health are deeply intertwined. It's why I believe that once Cecilia felt physically better and the systems in her body came back online, the anger would soften and she would become gentler with herself and others. As Cecilia told her story, she was able to articulate that she was mad that she was overweight. She was frustrated with her physical condition, her symptoms, and how awful she felt. She described it as I feel like my body is running away from me. Cecilia was also angry at the orthodox medical model and the care she was receiving because none of her doctors seemed to know how to help her. As I assessed Cecilia's physical presentation, it was clear she was still cycling, still bleeding regularly, which confirmed she was in perimenopause. She also reported a host of symptoms. Weight gain. This beautiful woman weighed close to two hundred and thirty pounds or 105 kilograms. She was experiencing strong resistance to losing the extra kilos despite her efforts. Severe fatigue. Cecilia was extremely fatigued, especially upon waking. She, in fact, had an inverted circadian rhythm, meaning she had low morning cortisol and high nighttime cortisol. Hot flushes and night sweats. These uncomfortable symptoms contributed to her disrupted sleep patterns. Hormonal imbalances Our tests confirmed that Cecilia was experiencing hormonal imbalances, specifically low progesterone and higher levels of estrogen. Increased adiposity. Cecilia had accumulated fat tissue beyond what is considered healthy. This was most likely due to her cortisol dysregulation, her hormonal imbalances, insulin resistance, and the way unresolved trauma can influence the body to hold on to protective weight. When the body rebels In addition to her symptoms, Cecilia had been previously diagnosed with Graves disease, an autoimmune condition that caused her thyroid to become overactive, hyperthyroidism, leading to weight loss, disrupted sleep, and excessive sweating. In some women, as in Cecilia's case, Graves' disease can eventually lead to thyroid damage, whether through the disease process itself, treatment or a shift in thyroid antibodies, to the point where the thyroid can no longer produce enough of the hormones needed to regulate metabolism, energy, heart rate, digestion, body temperature, and even mood. This transition from hypothyroidism to hypothyroidism, sometimes associated with Hashimoto's like features, meant Cecilia began experiencing a whole new set of symptoms weight gain, brain fog, joint pain, and mood swings. Yet, none of her doctors adjusted her medication to support her through this shift, leaving her feeling unwell, unseen, and yes, angry. I knew I could help Cecilia by giving her the tools she needed to begin to heal her body in alignment with its own unique biochemical timing. So much of the frustration Cecilia carried into my office was simply an external expression of what was happening inside her body, reflected in her biochemistry. As a practitioner, her anger prompted me to pause and look more closely to understand why this woman was presenting the way she was. Cecilia's story mattered, really mattered. You see, her ACE score was a 10, the highest possible on the ACE scale. As we continued to work together, I came to understand the severity of trauma and abuse she had experienced in her childhood. Honestly, I wasn't surprised given Cecilia's Hashimoto's diagnosis because, as we touched on earlier in the book, a high ACE score is often closely linked to an increased risk of autoimmune disease. Chronic trauma often becomes chronic stress, and over time that stress can dysregulate the immune system. In perimenopause, an autoimmune condition can make your symptoms feel more intense. Why? This is a time when your body is already going through major hormonal changes. And if your immune system is also out of balance, it can mistakenly attack your own tissues, adding another layer of stress and inflammation to the equation of your biochemistry.

Repair Gut Hormones And Cortisol

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Repair and Rebalance First. Before we get to Cecilia's journey to face and heal her childhood trauma, which I see so often begins during reclaim, let's first look at how we restored her foundational health through repair and rebalance. At this point, it shouldn't surprise you that we started by repairing Cecilia's disrupted gut microbiome to restore her digestion. I used the GI360, a comprehensive functional stool test, to assess her gut health and microbiome balance. In Cecilia's case, I also wanted to identify any nutrient deficiencies. We discovered that her iron, vitamin D, and magnesium levels were all low. This began a nine-month transformation of every cell in Cecilia's body. We repaired her gut, we rebalanced her hormones, brought more progesterone on board, and restored balance to her cortisol levels, which helped re-establish her circadian rhythm. So, Cecilia began to experience a healthy dawn effect, where her cortisol levels were highest in the morning, helping her feel alert, awake, and no longer completely smashed on waking. Then her cortisol levels naturally lowered throughout the day, reaching their lowest point at night to support deep, restful sleep.

Glucose Monitoring Builds Body Literacy

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One thing I encourage women to use in Reclaim is a glucose monitor. For Cecilia, monitoring her glucose levels after eating became a her aha moment. When it came to her diet, she proudly told me during our first visit, I don't cook and I won't cook. And that she would do her best to follow the protocol with Uber Eats. But even when you're choosing what seems like the cleanest option on the menu, a continuous glucose monitor can quickly reveal what's really happening in your body when you're eating out. That seemingly healthy Thai chicken salad Cecilia was ordering, she couldn't believe it spiked her blood glucose to 7 millimoles per liter. That moment gave Cecilia the valuable insight she needed, and it's the reason I encourage every woman to use a glucose monitor during reclaim, so they can see in real time how their food choices affect their blood sugar, energy, mood, and hormonal balance. It's not about perfection because you can always begin again. It's about building awareness. Once Cecilia could see the impact her food choices were having, she could make more informed choices. This is the kind of body literacy I want for every woman in Reclaim. Eventually, although not without some resistance, Cecilia began to shift. She started preparing her meals at home, and that simple change made a meaningful difference, improving both her gut health and helping reduce her insulin resistance. At what cost?

The Relationship Question At What Cost

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Now, let's shift our focus from her physical journey to what I could only describe as Cecilia's emotional journey in taking back her ability to choose herself. When Cecilia first started her treatment protocol, she was enmeshed in a relationship with a bloke who was emotionally unavailable to her. He was considerably older, and at age 60, he had children from a previous marriage and a grandchild. Cecilia and her partner owned a home and a farm together, and I'm quite sure at one point they were on the same page and cared deeply for each other. But over time, as much as Cecilia worked at the relationship, her partner wouldn't. On every level she was accepting a substandard relationship that didn't reflect her worth. She deserved so much more. She deserved a man who would choose her as much as she chose him. And yet, Cecilia continued to choose someone who consistently refused to meet her needs, emotionally, physically, and intellectually. He was absent, unavailable and distracted. Still, she kept choosing him. He disappointed her again and again, in what he was willing or unwilling to give her. Cecilia was angry with herself. Angry that even though she could see the truth of their relationship, she chose to stay in it. This is where her ace score and her history of having a narcissistic father tapped her on the shoulder. Because of the abuse she experienced growing up, something inside Cecilia didn't allow her to believe she was worthy of love or having her needs met. With this man, she found a relationship she knew, one that felt familiar. In her family of origin, she had known a relationship with a father who was emotionally unavailable, who repeatedly disappointed her, and who never met her needs or showed up with presence. Without understanding the connection between her upbringing and her choice of this partner, Cecilia chose a relationship that almost mirrored what she'd known growing up, because it felt familiar. I recognized that when Cecilia walked into my clinic in her cloud of anger, everything about her life felt uncomfortable. She was uncomfortable in her body. She felt unwell and disconnected, and she couldn't settle comfortably into her own skin. She felt stuck in a relationship that she kept choosing, even though it left her feeling unsatisfied and unseen, stuck with a man who constantly disappointed her with his inability to truly show up. One day I asked her a question At what cost do you continue to choose this relationship? Then I followed up with another question. At what point are you going to draw a line in the sand, both with reclaiming your health and in a relationship that is no longer serving you? I asked this beautiful soul these questions because I knew she deserved so much better. But it was only once Cecilia began healing her body, her gut, and her hormones, only when she was no longer in a depleted, deficient state that she could truly believe she deserved more. That she was worthy of love and attention. A laying down of what you've carried.

Trauma Has A Use By Date

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Each of us may carry some form of trauma. The thing that, for a time, caused us to put on the armor, carry the shield, and rely on coping mechanisms that once protected us from harm. For a while, those things worked, until they didn't. In perimenopause, with so many shifts happening in your biochemistry, you get tired. Tired of carrying the thing, the trauma. I often describe it this way. Trauma has a use by date, and at some point it expires. The trauma moves far enough away from us that we can finally begin to look at it safely and start to reintegrate the part of ourselves that was hurt. In perimenopause, that trauma will often tap you on the shoulder, either through the intensification of symptoms, or in your lack of readiness to finally face this stormy season every woman must navigate. This is the moment when you begin to lay down the coping mechanisms that once helped you survive, but no longer serve you. In reclaim, once repair and rebalance have taken place, you feel good, strong, vibrant, and vital. You begin to recognize that you no longer need these coping skills that once may have served you and no longer do. And so you can choose differently. That's precisely what Cecilia did. She began to choose differently. She chose to draw a line in the sand and bring her body and her biochemistry back into alignment. She chose to end a relationship that didn't satisfy her or bring her joy. Using some of the recipes from my cookbook, she began to choose to prepare delicious, colourful meals at home, and she no longer relied on Uber Eats. Cecilia chose to live in congruence, where her biology, her health, and her life choices were in harmony with her truth. Cecilia chose to eat in a way that nourished her body, not punished it. She chose to leave a relationship that was harming her, rather than continuing to accept it. She began to speak about her needs instead of suppressing them. Why? Because Cecilia finally believed she was worthy of everything she desired. She believed this relationship, this food, my health, I deserve more. I want more. I choose more. You deserve to choose differently. After nine months, Cecilia wasn't the same person, the same woman sitting before me. She had completely transformed. At a biochemical level, every cell in her body was operating at an optimal level. She looked different, stunning in fact. She'd shed twenty kilos. I could see her beautiful cheekbones again. Her slim waist and flat tummy had returned. Her autoimmune condition was no longer at play, with her markers significantly improved, because Cecilia was finally giving her body what it needed, to be nourished both physically and emotionally. In reclaim, as so many women do, Cecilia experienced a domino effect of deep healing. Meaning there was a direct correlation between letting go, laying down the trauma from her family of origin, while simultaneously walking away from a relationship that no longer served her. So her body let go of the adiposity, the extra weight that no longer served her. She was able to release unhealthy things on so many levels that it felt to both of us like true, whole person healing. We can all choose this kind of healing. We all deserve to choose this. When you start to feel well, strong, vibrant and vital, you begin to choose differently, just as Cecilia did. You start to think, I deserve to be in a relationship that nourishes and nurtures me. I deserve to eat food that nourishes my body. And I deserve to feel vibrant and beautiful. The minute Cecilia believed those truths, believed that she did deserve more, that's when the beauty and gifts of reclaim began to appear in her life.

Whole Person Healing And Reintegration

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For Cecilia, it was a nine-month transformative journey, one that unfolded according to her own biochemical timing. Her healing didn't happen only in her body, it happened in her mind and in her social and emotional life. What she experienced was a complete biopsychosocial reintegration. This is what I want for every woman stuck in the throes of perimenopause. When you heal, seal, and repair your gut, when you rebalance your hormones and reclaim your vitality and metabolic health, you will have your phoenix moment, your own rising, just like Cecilia did. Her story illustrates that healing is never just physical, it is biopsychosocial. When your biochemistry stabilizes and comes back online, clarity returns. The body feels safe and the heart opens. From this new place of vitality and worth, you make choices differently. This is what I want for you too. Reclaim is about the moment you step into your vitality, your power, and stop settling for less than you deserve. It's when you will start choosing differently and begin living in a way that fully reflects your worth.

Release Old Weight And Close

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In the final chapter, I want to explore one last thing: what it means to truly lay down what your body and spirit no longer need to carry. Because as you reclaim your vibrancy, there's often one more layer to release the invisible weight of unresolved trauma, old stories, and long held burdens. This next part of your journey is about release, renewal, and remembering the woman you were always meant to be.